My journey towards positivity and self belief has opened my eyes and made me realised a few really vital things such as this. This is the 4th blog in the 5 part blog series of the goal getting challenge.
 
I used to look at really successful people and think;
“Oh well, I don’t have the money they have”
“They landed lucky on an idea, I’m never going to be able to do anything like that”
“Well I don’t have any talents”
I’m not clever or smart enough to do that”
Those self-limiting thoughts made an appearance almost as quickly as the idea to make a difference, a change in my life did. I never understood the phrase “One day at a time” either. My brain doesn’t really work like that. I think we’re programmed to almost look at the end result, without understanding that it takes a journey of little steps to get there… Now however, I get it! There’s so many quotes flying around the internet and ideological ideas of how to become successful, live the life you want or reach for your dreams, I think they lose their meaning…It’s only when you’re going through a time of change, growth, a metamorphosis if you like and reflecting on your journey do those quotes or ideas start to make real sense…
 
For me, it’s been the reflecting part that has really made me not only understand, but really value how significant those little steps are…I mean, they are the main part of your journey, but once you become successful, reach your dream goals, they are forgotten. But it’s those small steps that you must recognise, remember and celebrate them! No matter how small! They’re the reason you’re where you are now. This happened almost by accident for me; I needed a way to try and make a record of my thoughts whilst I was on the move and jotting it down on a piece of paper or even in my phone wasn’t always an option…
 
As a teenager, I was always a reflective learner, I’d like to mull it over, sit back, observe the interactions, social clues, the debate and let it sink in, before giving my definitive answer. That didn’t mean I was always right by the way! So how the hell did I find myself in a hall, full of drama folk, pretending to declare their undying love for one another and then when the teacher yelled “Switch!” they did the same act to another, then another and so on. I will never forget that first day of college! Every being in my body screamed “What the hell are you doing here!” I was completely out of my comfort zone! I’ve never felt more awkward in my life! Well….there was this one time when….sorry! Wrong blog! But I gave it a go, I took part, there was no time for reflection in these activities, it was full on and in your face… But, I’ll tell you what it did do…it equipped me with confidence and when needed, I could fake it too. It was definitely worth the 2 years I gave it….
 
So, my secret weapon was sought! A voice recorder! Genius right! It doesn’t matter what works for you, as long as it works for you! This enabled me to record any and every little idea that came into my head whilst driving (I drive a lot for work, plus, other people just assumed I was talking to someone and not myself!). Unbeknown to me at the time, this would become where I would log my whole journey….It became my journal, where I would update on what I had been doing, what was going on at work, but more importantly the little wins I had, how I was feeling and understanding why I was feeling the way I was. I used to think that at the start of my journey, I would have to be positive at all times! Let nothing phase me, as that was the only way I could carry this through…. But it’s not about that and that is a lot of damn pressure to put on yourself! It was also allowing yourself to accept that you are feeling that way, experiencing that feeling, letting it pass and then reflecting on it. I did a lot of this! I could pinpoint the moments that were turning points, that “levelled me up” that gave me even more confidence, a boost.

I don’t talk about my day job too much, because, to be honest, I like to keep the two things very separate. However, the two worlds do collide from time to time. I was working with a young person a few weeks back and a considerable part of my job is writing; normally formal letters, complaints, enquiries, requests, that kind of thing. 

As I work in partnership with the clients I come in contact with, in a very person centred way, everything is checked in with them, as it should be. Anyways, I was reading a letter I’d drafted up for my client, over the phone, for him to ok and to be fair, all I’m doing is putting what they’ve told me, into a legible document, for it to be investigated and responded to. I didn’t recognise any particular skill involved on my part. After I’d read the letter back to him, he said “You’re pretty good at this aren’t you?!” I started to say “Oh well it’s your words really…” bla bla…and totally accepting the compliment. So he said again “No but you are good at this sort of thing aren’t you?!” He kinda backed me into a corner to accept his compliment and I said, “Well yes, I suppose I am!”
 
This little realisation got me to start thinking and reflecting on when I was much younger and always loved to write! I couldn’t believe that I had forgotten. At a parents evening with my mum, I recall my English teacher stating that he dreaded coming to my work, because of how much I’d write. It’s like I couldn’t stop once I started and the words would just effortlessly flow… I completely put those memories to the back of my mind and that young person unknowingly reminded me.
 
But aren’t those small steps the most significant? Think of yourself or your first born child, how much of a fuss is made when you can sit up on your own for the first time, get on all fours and begin to crawl; when you can pull yourself up, take your first step and then walk…. but you’d have never walked if you didn’t at first learn to sit up…. It’s the subtle things that you do every day towards your dream/target/goal/success that aids your transition. The small steps that make those big significant changes.
 
With this in mind…
 
Reflecting on your journey helps you recognise those small steps. Find a way to capture that reflection that suits you, so you can look back at them. I do this regularly.
 
Celebrate your small wins! When you recognise those small steps that have got you to where you are now, celebrate them! Congratulate yourself! Give yourself a pat on the back, treat yourself, because you’ve come so far.
 
Never forget, it’s those small steps that will get you to where you want to be. It matters not how long it takes, or where others are on their journey… Just do you and focus on that, because that is what is important!
 
It doesn’t matter what journey you’re on, whether it’s keeping fit, eating healthier, going for that promotion, challenging negative thoughts or reaching for your dreams….you can adopt this approach with any type of journey.
 
And lastly, Well done! I’m rooting for you…
 
Until next time…
 
Serena x
 
If this is the first time you’ve read a blog of mine and liked it, check out my others or subscribe and feel free to share my blog with others you think will benefit!
 
Find the share option, at the bottom right of the picture via the three dots.

She believed she could so she did, Serena believed she could, small steps equal big changes, Serena Rogers, Nottingham, your why factor, journey towards positivity and self belief, positivity and self belief are the key to unlocking your potential